Something the Lord might say?

I AM

I am all.
Nothing else can ever be.

I fill all.
There cannot be an outside of Me.

I have no beginning.
I can have no end.

I am existence itself.
Boundless - Absolute

Nothing can compare with Me,
Because I am alone.

There is no standard or object
through which I can be understood or known.

Nothing can change or influence My being.
Nothing can challenge my Lordship.

Eternally - timelessly,
I remain the same.

I lack nothing, because there is nothing for Me to lack.
I fear nothing, because there is nothing to threaten Me.
I seek for nothing, since there is nothing for Me to seek.
I am pure being, free from wants and desires.

By thinking of Me as an object, no matter how sublime or subtle,
you miss the mark completely.
I am beyond and within the thought and the thinker.

Wherever you stand, I make up and occupy that very spot.
I am that place entire. In fact, there is nowhere else to be.

Right now, as always, we are Me.

If this is the case, then how did you come to be?
Truly, you never did.
From where could you possibly have come?
What could possibly have caused your birth?
Nay, I am all, and there is no changing infinity.
I cannot add a single straw to Me. Nor can I take away.

Within the mystery of Being - My sole Infinite Being,
there are simultaneous perspectives. In two ways I constantly perceive Myself.

One perspective is pure - a gaze which pierces all and recognizes all as Me - an Infinite ray which sees only Truth and knows only Truth. It is a gaze free from knowledge, superseding knowledge, and in need of no knowledge. Forever free from delusion it rests eternally in its own light.

From the same formless Infinity springs another perspective. Like its twin gaze it never began and will never end, but its interpretation of Me is altogether different.

Looking straight back at its own Infinite Being, it sees form.
Understanding itself as space-time it tries to make sense of what it Perceives.

These spaces and forms of My constant play, must change continuously. Natural as they are, they cannot escape their temporary condition. As a flawed interpretation of My Eternal Being, they are unable to remain, and will rise and fall away without end – ephemerally, inevitably.
This is where you come into the picture. Seeing forms you believe yourself to be form. Seeing change, you believe yourself to change. I am doing this.

You, my heart, is not you. You are Me, believing myself to be you. As you watch your true Self (Me), from your perspective of relativity, you see land, wind, and sea. You see planets, stars, and galaxies.

This is but one of the many ways which I can seem, when I look at Me, reading Myself as worlds. Long grass moving like waves in the wind. Ancient volcanic rock molded by rain. Mothers comforting their restless children. A defenseless deer surrounded by wolves.

The “stuff” that makes up My formless Consciousness and Nature is unfathomably suggestive. I am endless possibilities. I am all worlds, and all dimensions.

How did this happen? When did I forget Myself in you?

Truly, I never did. I am watching you. I am watching as you, from within yourself right now. I am what you perceive as your living flesh, and every breath you take. I am what you understand as the myriad of cells holding you together, as well as the text before your eyes – My eyes

Simultaneously, I am that perspective who interprets itself as isolated from the truth and Being of Me, and believes itself an individual person, cut off from neighbors, nature, and the many stars and heavenly bodies glimmering back from the night-sky.

Watching all of these things, you see only Me. In fact, it is Me seeing Myself as I have always done. I see Myself clearly, formlessly, AND I see Myself as the Universe you perceive. You are but an idea, conceptualized by one of my perspectives, and brought to a semi-existence through one of My interpretations of Myself.

You, this misinterpretation of Truth, have forgotten your True Self. Yes, I know, even this ignorant you is Me, but being an idea it can neither change nor hurt Me. I am beyond change. With My good eye, I do not even see you. All is Me. Apart from a thought – a Word – in Me, you never were.

As I speak these words it may seem I have two eyes, but in fact they are but two simultaneous perspectives, timelessly, and eye-lessly beholding Me. For the sake of understanding, I will here name them my two eyes, and call them the Eye of Truth, and the Eye of Relativity.

The Eye of Truth sees and recognizes Me as Me. Its perfection and all-seeing nature makes it superfluous to itself. Seeing all as it is, it sees nothing. All is light beyond light. Pure boundless Being. There is nothing for it to make out, because it is in itself all it sees. Void, you might say, but then you do not understand.

The Eye of Relativity watches the same and only Reality, but doing so it misses the Essence. One might compare it to being so enthralled by the waves on the ocean that it doesn't see the water. Or perhaps by looking at a snow-ball seeing only the ball, while being fully ignorant of the snow. This is the way of the Eye of Relativity, whose nature will always remain unaltered.

Through the gaze of this Eye, My consciousness attaches itself to form. I'm not affected by it, but the dolls spawned from the gaze come “alive” through My life, which is without limit or end.

Being everywhere, the Eye of Relativity fills the forms it perceives (creates), and when those forms have eyes themselves, they share the power of this Eye. Watching Me it sees Creation. Examining Creation, it sees space and time.

Creation isn't something I caused countless eons ago. I make up all worlds now. What you call Creation, or the Universe, is generated right now, and only now. I am Eternal and Infinite – beyond time and space. In your inner self, you know this. What then, I ask you, would cause me to “one day” come up with the idea of a universe? What would suddenly stir in me or provoke me to make something new, which didn't exist before? I have been forever and ever. Imagine billions and billions of years, then multiply those by yet other billions of years, and I still was eternities before those. I have no beginning, and I have nothing outside of Me. There is no context for me to act or age in, but my own timeless Self. I am. Feel it in your very body, My being. You are Me. Taste this Now from which all things arise, and know that it is My Essence that make up Reality at all times.

To explain this, I will look closer at your every day experience, and point out for you how you play yourself into existence, and why it causes you stress and suffering. I will teach you about the perspective through which you were constructed – My Eye of Relativity.

Stay with this blog. Go through the old posts. Read the accounts of holy men, monks and nuns through the ages and edges of the world, and perhaps you will find something to kindle the work and beginnings of transformation. Maybe one day, you will let go of your relative self, and thus come to see through both of my Eyes. At that point, the space you now perceive between us, will vanish in an instant. Indeed, it will have never been.

What is Liberation?

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

What I'm about to do now is to illustrate the impossible, which means I will fail. Still, I would like an attempt to visualize the grand liberation. What I cover here is by no means complete, and the pictures are just intended to make a point.

 

This first picture is a chart of the ordinary set of mind. We could call it 'reality as you know it', or perhaps simply 'you'. The mind of the normal person typically moves speedily and rather randomly between these things, and more. We go from worrying about one thing, to hoping for another, then we plan some thing, and dwell on memories of others. All these pictures, ideas, and thoughts (attachments) replace one another all through the day – a process which normally goes on for as long as we live.

Stress, which is so very common today, increases the speed and the weight of this “capsule” of our minds. All things seem utterly important, yet as attachment intensifies reality loses its vibrancy. The mind, we can say, smothers reality (as it is). To many people (perhaps most), this confinement of me is all they know. They are trapped in it, and fully dependent on it.

Liberation (salvation) is what comes into being when “you” happen to find yourself outside of the mind capsule. This is what the illustration below indicates. From a constant, busy, hard to balance, ping pong-like rush from one thing to another, you have somehow managed to let go. Yes, it can feel as if you actually let go of something physical, like a rock. Suddenly there is great spaciousness, peace, and a perfectly liberating freedom... from yourself. It is so clear you can almost look at it, much like you can behold a can of tuna. The confinement of you, with all its attributes, is there before you, and while you still have access to all this mind-stuff, you are now watching it restfully from infinity. Your senses still absorb the same physical reality, but the experience of being is altogether altered.

 

Full enlightenment would mean a permanent shift into, and complete re-identification with, free, infinite consciousness, but one can temporarily taste and acquaint Liberation at any point. The main reason for spiritual practice is not to glimpse or quickly touch this Kingdom, but to be able to remain there, when the gates open. Any fool (like me) can manage a quick encounter.

There are two main ways of discovering or entering Liberation (which partially or fully frees a person for life), and those are; forming the mind and having the mind formed.

The first way is activity – and is about making the mind calm enough to discover reality outside of it. When it no longer jumps here and there with great speed, we have a chance to actually see. This is done through techniques like meditation, yoga, silence, solitude, abstinence, charity and so on. Beliefs, which say that there is something more to reality, than the obvious, may help since the mind (perhaps through prayer) reaches out beyond itself for guidance and communion. Faith, regardless of belief, is of even greater value, since it puts absolute trust in whatever it is that holds life and reality together. Faith is to trust the Lord, whatever the Lord might be, and to know in the heart, that whatever brought this Universe into existence knows how to handle it. Faith is to give yourself fully to (completely relax into) God – ultimate reality.

The second way is passivity – which comes whether we wish to or not. Reality (life as we know it) has a nasty habit of crashing now and then. Pieces of the mind-puzzle suddenly disappears in unforeseeable accidents or undesirable diseases, for example. This creates a space, which is a window of opportunity in this case. When death, deafening change, or simple inactivity strikes, most of us are too eager to fill that gap with something new. Some people however come to see reality with sharper eyes when they experience loss, but only those who dare behold emptiness honestly for some time. Finally there is the mystery of God's being and light, which for reasons we cannot grasp, come to enter into some individuals when they least expect it. This, supposedly, is the most effective way to go beyond oneself, and to participate knowingly in His grace.

Only the first way can be practiced. The stillness achieved might look strange and perhaps even pointless from inside the capsule. However, daring to come back frequently to silence will inevitably (I dare say) make your head slip through that boundary which separates Earth from Heaven, and that experience, dear reader, is worth every hardship you have ever gone through, and many many more.
Blessed be the struggles of everyone. Freedom to the world!

 

God Can't Change... His Mind

All that is subject to change is born and die away. The Lord doesn't. If God was subject to change He would constitute no salvation. If we, in some way, could convince Him to change His “mind”, we wouldn't be able to trust Him. He would then be a pawn to the strongest will, or best rhetoric, just like you and I. 

It is the Eternal nature of The Lord that makes Him worthy of our adoration, and our deepest Love. He is the One mountain that will never yield to the winds of change. He is the Infinite sea from which all waves rise and fall.

Many people believe God to be fickle. They envision Him listening carefully to their prayers, and then after some consideration, responding to their desires. They picture God as someone who bends down to the drama of Man and makes decisions based on our strengths and shortcomings - rethinking His policy with the turn of every tide.

How can a Father like that please anything but our personal and egoistical agendas? God saw me, he heard my cries, and because of my honesty and need, he took pity on my soul. Isn't that an extremely self-centered way of thinking? The neighbor just died from cancer, and children not far from here are drugged and sold as sex slaves. Try; In my cries, because I gave an honest voice to my need, I was fortunate to experience God, and experiencing God I was healed.

Now, it may be, that what I'm saying suggests a very dull Lord, one who is closer to a natural force, like gravity, than something alive, like a Person. I believe both of these ideas to be misleading. The picture of a magnet may be clarifying: You, a small shard of the greater Magnet, twitch and turn in your prayer, shedding some of the covering dirt (ego) you have gathered over the years, and thus, you make possible for the Magnet proper to attract you. You have moved within reach. It feels now as if He is doing the work, but He always pulled you to Him with the same strength. Only due to the circumstances, and your willingness to come before Him, are you now able to experience His presence. Perhaps this may even cause changes to the events around you, because all things move around Him. But it is not due to a change in Him, but rather the re-alignment between you.

Everyone alive know that strange things happen. The natural world we inhabit is not apart from Him, and though our societies may be horrendous and insane, His presence shines through them. The Universe is highly dynamic and reflects a dynamic aspect of the Lord. He is everywhere, and it is His very being (not will) that causes all events and phenomena. Aligned with Him we live in Paradise. Separated from Him we move through Hell. This is not because the Lord wills it, but because He IS (what is). When we refuse to partake in Him, or hide in a reality of our own ego-centric and individualistic making, we fail hellishly. The Universe can't sustain illusion. That's where all the pain comes from. It is a skewed perspective, that paints a demonic face upon the Eden countenance of God. The Bible calls it His judgment, and even His wrath, but there is no malice or punishing mind behind this hammer. It is simply the result of our ignorance, and His inevitable nature. He is love Eternal.

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8)

We are plants that can either grow into Loving Union with Him, or turn dry dead in the misconception and refusal of His Light. From an isolated perspective the surrounding world becomes an enemy of me. Through earnest meditation, prayer, and love we heal that imagined disjunction, and reality is made clear to us. His eternal work (being) becomes our own. Through us, as persons, His being becomes action. Look at action spawned from such Unity, and behold; there is the will of God, adapting to the situation at hand, healing the world, so that its waves may be a never-ending melody, in tune with His unchanging essence.

When I now pray; May He help us find His will inside of us, it is not so that He may hear me, but so that I may better hear Him. The Lord doesn't need our prayers, but when we perform them sincerely, His voice reaches its audience, and transforms it into his leaves. We shouldn't pray for God to shape the world into our image, but for us to accept being shaped into His. This is not watching the world being destroyed and calling it the work of the Lord, but to see God's Love in everything, and to shape the world stage for its Artistry.

The Wisdom of Cherry Picking

To make sense of reality the mind has to catalogue every phenomena and put them inside distinct compartments, which it labels as best it can. One good example of the effects of mind-boxes is the 'all or nothing'-approach which seems so very common today, and something that Christians (for example) regularly have to deal with. Unless they can defend every aspect, expression, and action performed under the banner of Christianity for the last 2000 years, some people will give them a really hard time.

The same thing happens with the Bible. If you love the book, yet refuse to defend (or believe) every single chapter of it, you are likely to be accused of 'cherry picking', by some atheists. What that expression means in this context is something like this "Unless you stand behind the whole tree, including the berries I have deemed rotten, you shouldn't defend it at all" This I find a very narrow-minded (which means few and tight mind compartments) way of looking at things.

If we wish to walk the spiritual path with honesty, meaning we don't take what we hear for granted but examine it for ourselves, I see no other way but to engage in this kind of cherry-picking. It is impossible to understand Scripture from day one, and even more impossible to understand all of Scripture.

How beautiful a thing it is to read something that inspires us, to initiate or continue on the path, perhaps a single line from the Gospels, The Qur'an, or the Bhagavad Gita. Imagine asking someone who just opened the Bible, why Abraham was ready to slay his own son, and then demand that he/she defended that seemingly barbaric choice of the Patriarch.

If we find anything to hold on to, in the way of spiritual food, then let those two or three berries alone help us begin our ascent of the tree of Heaven. Spiritual progress and understanding happens in steps, and no book has to be embraced in full, to reach the grand destination.

What wine does to violent men doesn't count for all, and so it is with religions. They are indeed powerful tools of transformation, which need to be exercised with a sense of balance, and that's precisely why we shouldn't swallow any of them all at once. We certainly can't defend every limb and twig while barely holding on to one, and if anyone pushes us to do so, it is wise to stick to, and be content with, the cherries we have already cherished – those whose taste we well know.

So, was Mary ACTUALLY a virgin when she gave birth to Jesus, and was he REALLY conceived by the Holy Ghost? Shake your shoulders, and answer truthfully; How would I know? I'm not looking in to that right now, because it doesn't really influence my spiritual practice, nor my way of life. We say these words in Church, but I'm not all that concerned with them, and the joy which this path brings me, doesn't change either way.

As we start to engage in spiritual practice, like meditation for example, we begin from a point of ignorance. We don't really know what is happening. Only with time do we start to understand what the practice does to us. While we may happen upon blissful states, or sudden insights early on, we can in no way understand the full effects the practice can bring about. The same goes for reading scripture, and a religious way of life. Slowly we have to venture ever deeper into waters unfamiliar to us. Understanding that is also understanding the importance and wisdom of "cherry picking". We may trust the words of our elders, masters, priests, or teachers, but we really can't defend a tower upon which we do not yet stand, nor can we truthfully embrace those we have only heard about. Yet, from one berry alone, we can say that this tree bears fruit, and that it is worth holding on to. With the chance of one more fresh berry upon it, I will climb it all the way to the grave.

A berry a day, keeps the devil away... and will eventually make the walls of our compartments fall. The Spirit can stand no such brain-made boundaries. However, if we pretend to know that which we do not, or identify too strongly with our favorite compartments, then accusations like "cherry picking" are bound to make those mind-boxes into safes, in which only small and graven idols of the Lord can be secured. His majesty and essence will roam freely, somewhere else entirely.

Opening the Ribcage

When I recently came across the quote below, by Thich Nhat Hanh, posted by the Thich Nhat Hanh Quote Collective on Facebook, my heart was greatly moved. Twice in the last couple of years I have come to see very clearly my own shut door, by having it opened slightly to the greater world, for a little while. Without this experience it is really hard to understand or see what I will try to point at in this post, but perhaps by reading the beautiful lines below we can begin to imagine an opening of the soul.

“Since I learned how to love you,
the door of my soul has been left wide open
to the winds of the four directions.”

~ Thich Nhat Hanh

When we think of ourselves as separate individuals moving through a world apart from us, there arises a great need for physical and mental protection. The fear generated by such a perspective results inevitably in the construction of a mental armor – a closed gate. I believe most of us never reflect upon this part of our psyche, and we are therefore largely unaware of it. I, at least, was almost fully unaware of mine before I was fortunate enough to have it opened for a while, which gave some perspective.

As we grow up we become reserved (mildly put), and suspicious of everything we encounter. We keep things at a distance, and only rarely do we somewhat dare open the gates to our hearts and souls. Thus, as we meet new people, and even nature itself, we do so in a halfheartedly and protective fashion, inviting them barely to the edge of our inner gates. This mainly happens on an unconscious and automatic level, but if we pay close attention to how we approach the world, we may come to notice this to some extent.

My first experience of having this armor opened, was at a Sesshin (Zazen meditation retreat), while doing outdoor walking meditation, and just like expressed in the Thich Nhat Hanh quote, I felt as if the wind was suddenly allowed inside of me, and the whole scenery could then enter through a great gate consisting of my chest. The sense of separation between subject (myself) and object (the world) was thereby substantially lessened.

Since these experiences I have tried to remember the feeling of those moments when I meet people, whether friends or new acquaintances, and to be aware of how I approach them. Doing my best with being as fearless as possible, I welcome them with my chest and body straight towards them and as mentally naked as I can manage.

A great part of the spiritual path is walked by learning how to receive. It is about welcoming the places, events, and people we come across and to acknowledge was is. While we might be busy with making an impression, acting, judging, and labeling what we see, the secret is to receive what comes before us, without disturbing its revelation, with the noise of our own self-portrayal. Even when we act, it is vital that we listen in this way, so that we can become aware of what we're really doing. Life is free though, and that is true even of the most profound dimensions of it. Therefore, if we can learn to keep the bowls of our selves empty and welcoming, Heaven will provide the wisdom, joy, and compass for further travels. If we can muster the courage, to slightly open our ribcages, and let the sharpness of life touch our sensitive hearts just a little bit, then we will also open ourselves to the winds of the Lord, and from their whispers, steadfastness and an even greater courage will grow.

I really recommend everyone to study how we welcome and relate to situations and people. How do we approach them physically (posture, direction, facial expression)? What happens on the mental level? (emotions, thoughts). If possible, are there changes we can make, for a more inviting, and less protective stance? Do we welcome the world to enter at all, or do we still prefer to keep it at a distance?

That Mystery, which brought us about, supplies us with food, keeps us warm, and in a great other number of ways sustains our being, have we learned how to trust it yet? To what extent do we dare bare our hearts to its immensity?

Love, they say, is best done naked.

One Indestructible Tower

I'm playing with building blocks, together with my very young daughter. Being a person trained and active in the making of art, I soon start to envision the small “artwork” I have laid the foundation to on our living-room floor. In a miniature fashion I'm sort of thrilled and eager about seeing it finished. My daughter however has other joys entirely, and finds it very amusing to destroy my construction, when it's only half way done. With a sigh I gather the pieces anew and start over. This time, I get a little further before CRASH, she once more turns it to ruins (and laughs hysterically, clearly pleased with her power).

When it happened this scene illustrated very clearly to me, what I already knew; that our joy must be based primarily in being and doing (adding one block to another) rather than in our goals or achievements (the finished construction). Achievements are very elusive, ideas really, that keep us dreaming about and dreading the future, and regretting or lingering in the past.

When we are not content in being, our actions are strained and restless. The fruits of our actions (if we ever get there) end up unwholesome – a reflection of our inquietude. Just as a starving person will care little for the shape, form, or balance of the meal, when discontented we sow and reap disharmony.

That we need desire and discontentment to propel our cultures and societies forward is simply not true. It is impossible to stay passive on a spinning globe, where suns and seasons have us thrown around in an ever changing carousel. That Life naturally seeks to continue, is by itself enough to initiate action, and that action is so much more wisely chosen and executed, from a place of contentment, and a background awareness of eternity.

Only at that moment, when you no longer desire IT, will I dare entrust you with IT's power.

For balance we should get our priorities right and find our joys firstly in being, secondly in doing, and thirdly, in achieving. As it is now, many of us reverse this order, and only manage to live when they manage to achieve. The rest of life is reduced to a means of “getting there”, to a few highlights, in an otherwise barely bearable existence.

How then can we find contentment in being by itself, enjoy doing what needs to be done, and celebrate achievement when The Lord allows it to happen? The answer is simply to change our focus and investments. I believe we have all experienced forcing ourselves to do something seemingly “boring” or “pointless” (like moving the lawn, shoveling snow, or perhaps playing with toys with our children) only to at some point discover it to be rather pleasant. When that happens we have managed to shed our ambitions, plans, hunger, and fears, and entered for a while the simplicity of being. Materials then feel more tangible, forms more beautiful, and living things turn much more alive. There is then happiness in being by itself, and time no longer veils the wealth of living.

Treasures are found where we dig, and where we dig only. Harmony and fulfillment is discovered by digging persistently in the right place, and that place is right here, and right now. Here is the only place that will never leave us – The one tower that cannot be destroyed, neither by the whims of men, nor the play of immortals.

Can you find (be) it?

"...Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

(Luke 12:33-12:34)

A Daily Dance with Shiva

Have I died yet today? Have I let go of all the energies that currently pull me into this and that? Have I stilled myself for a while, to assert and re-establish my contact with the ground? Shiva, the destroying aspect of the Absolute (in Hinduism), makes space for new life to prosper. Can I dance His dance, and experience renewal each and every day? Do I dare be new today? What is THIS very moment? What does it call me to be? In which way does it create me? Yes, here I am, open and free to listen.

The struggles, obligations, demands, opinions, ideas, identities, and worries we carried yesterday, are to be consumed in the holy fire of being, so that we can face this moment with the freshness and vigilance of spring. Let us taste the pure awareness of our being. Truly it is free from all these things. It wants for nothing, but simply is.

Let us allow ourselves to simply be like that. Let's die away from all the notions we have of who we are, what we want, and what Life is. Breath deeply, and experience the sensations of being. Receive them in their utter simplicity. Can we do so without adding anything? Can we do so without analyzing and labeling what right now IS? There are no questions here. There are no problems to solve. There is simply being. Movement.

There, something calls for my attention. A baby cries. Listen the sound of it. Feel the vibration of it. Welcome the experience of it. It plays with my ear. A small sensation of pain right there inside the ear. Welcome pain. How do you feel? What is your nature? I walk, feet on the floor. There is the form or the baby. How sweet. I lift it up and pull it to my chest. Sensations. Warmth. Life. I don't demand the baby to be silent. Feel the soles of the feet on the tiles. Feel the pressure of the chest against the infant. I allow it to cry for as long as it wants. I just do what I know to do, and rock it slowly back and forth. There is no hurry. I'm not trying to be in two places at once. There is only the matter of priority. The phone rings, and the food in the oven calls for my attention. I move steadily to the phone, and turn it off. How does the button feel against my finger? Smooth. I put down the crying baby on the floor, and move to the oven. Listen to the cries. They intensify, and change pitch for a while. Now, the handle of the oven. A little warm. Opening. Heat in my face. Slowly and carefully I take out the food and place it somewhere safe. Only ever one thing at a time. Always present to what happens. No demands. Simple being. No rush. There is the baby again. I walk back and start comforting it once more. Stay present to the sensations in the body, and the awareness in which all this appears. Have faith in being. Let the baby cry.

Through a Mystery the Universe of forms came into being. It expanded and created stars and galaxies. Stars died and planets were born. Simple organisms and plants were brought to life, and then more complex forms, animals, and finally beings. Was there a problem during this process? Who went through great stress to make all this happen? Naturally, and simply, all these things evolved. Through being, being came into being.

Our lives and actions are this very process, and it is still going on. Our only problem is that we do not trust it. We do not allow it to happen as it happens. We fight it. We thus rebel against the Lord, our maker. We make demands on reality, and we go to war with it, to realize our version of Life, as if we, separate from the Universe, could control it by ourselves. What happened to 'Thy will be done'?

I am not talking about passivity, but speak again about acceptance, and perspective. When does living turn into problems? Where does it happen? What is a problem? I once saw a film about newborn pikes, and how they grew into maturity, by consuming their brothers and sisters. As soon as one of the siblings had grown to be a fraction larger than the others, it ate them – swallowed them whole. In many beautiful lakes there are great pikes swimming around. Is the cannibalism of pikes a problem? Should we teach them manners?

Do we dare to let go of ego here, and see to what extent problems are made by us? Calming down, and letting go of ourselves for a while, we are given perspective. When we stand firmly in the purity and simplicity of being, it is easier to see what is what, and how we paint reality in our image, rather than the Lords. By dying away from this distortion of Truth, and by ceasing to fight the Lord's process, we become able to accept it for what it truly is. Seeing it clearly, we dare enter it, and when we become One with it, we have fully entered His Kingdom.

Feel the life-giving breath, going in and out, automatically, then ask yourself again; What is most important today?

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (Matthew 6:26-6:27)

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself..."
(Matthew 6:33-6:34)

The Weakness of Spiritual Teachings

Those who could profit most from spiritual teaching have no chance to grasp them, and those who no longer need the teachings, are the only ones who fully comprehend their message. If you have never seen a forest, or a plant, it is impossible to make sense of the green parts on the map. You can stare at them for hours on end, and yet, you will only delude yourself while trying to understand them.

We have all been invited to the greatest party of all, but it seems the Host wrote encrypted invitation cards, and has only delivered the key to a lucky few. Most of us have no clue as to where or when the party is held. Now how do we get hold of this code key?

Can we trust those who claim to have it? Can, yes, but I wouldn't recommend it. Walk instead into that silent meadow, where the Manor of our Host is situated, and sit down upon the grass before His doorstep, and wait patiently. If He doesn't open the door, come back again, and do so regularly until you receive it. Don't shout, demand nothing, and expect nothing, because He can't stand ungrateful guests. Just remain perfectly still, and as silent as you possibly can. With some luck, He will allow your presence, and He can't hide in that House of His forever, can he?

When it comes to pass, that you make out His silhouette through the window by the door, something will happen inside of you that you cannot explain, and going back to that card of invitation, it will suddenly make sense to you. Though the words looked like real words even before, you will now see that though you could read them, you missed out on their meaning. You may now read them for the first time, and they will tell you what you already know. Because in that brief glance of the Host, something utterly silent was communicated, and in you the full invitation is now made visible - written on your very being. Reading the card will pull these words from your innermost self and into your mind, so that they may make sense also on that level. Welcome to the party!

On these issues Paul writes very well:

"The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned." (1 Corinthians 2:14)

"Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly--mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it..." (1 Corinthians 3:2)

A 14^th century Zen Buddhist Master puts it this way:

“Even if, for example, one were to read a thousand sutras and ten thousand sastas, if the Dharma eye has not been opened, this Buddha wisdom would not be clear. One who has not clearly penetrated Buddha wisdom will not understand even one line of sutra.”

(Zen Mater Bassui. “Know Your Inherit Nature Before Studying the Scriptures.” Mud & Water. Wisdom Publications, Boston, Revised and expanded edition. 2002 Arthur Braverman. p.89)

If, before this experience, you find something intriguing, exciting, slightly attractive, or mysterious, in spiritual scripture or teachings, stay with them, but keep them open, and keep yourself open. Don't make up your mind about them, and don't let anyone else make up your mind for you. Accept that you do not know, and seek the Lord primarily in Life rather than in Scripture. A straw of grass, on the lawn outside the Church building, has more Truth and substance than the entire Bible. Touch the hand of another human being once, and you will have come closer to the Truth than you will through a lifetime of lofty ideas and thinking.

No book in the world can affect The Lord's presence and infinite being. If we'd rather read a tourist guide to Mount Everest than climbing the Mountain, we can do so, but though very importantly, it can direct us to the tracks most suitable for climbing, it does a poor job with replacing the experience of the Mountain, which, we have to understand, doesn't come or go with books or words.

Disarming the Gorillas of Life

All spiritual traditions advocate detachment, or non-attachment, as it is sometimes called. Spiritual teachers, contemporary, and from the past, all have different ways to explain and express this very important principle of religious practice/conduct. Zen Master Bassui says we shall walk through this world as if it was a village ridden with pestilence (touch nothing), and Jesus expresses it even more radically when he states: "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father, mother, wife, children, brothers, and sisters, as well as his own life, he can't be my disciple. (Luke 14:26)

Like all spiritual teachings these are pointers meant for investigation and guidance. If they are understood as truth in themselves misunderstandings are inevitable. It would certainly be very stupid to love our enemies while simultaneously hating our families. What then, do they mean? And why should we detach ourselves from life and the many gifts of our Lord?

Just like the fish cannot know what water is, since it is constantly submerged in it, we cannot know what life is, until we (to some level) become free from it. When it happens, that we come to see life, not from a point of being submerged in it, but from a point of detachment, it is truly a fabulous revelation. Great unstoppable laughter is then likely to erupt, because the strangeness of life, and the incredible reality of its being, is pure awe and tremendous joy. In amazement we look around, and for the first time we become fully aware of the fact that; this really is! Just like fire is unaware of heat, we are not fully aware us, and if we cannot know our own nature, then how will we ever know the Lord, in whose mysterious image we're created? As it is, we are far too involved in the details and desires of daily life, to manage any kind of perspective.

Let's put it this way. To become free from the leashes of earthly life, we must neither desire, nor repel the phenomena and objects we here encounter. Neither negatively or positively charged energy can create the stillness and spaciousness required for perspective. Only when the energies of life are allowed to flow freely through us, without clinging to our consciousness, can we hope to elevate ourselves enough from the stickiness of the world, to experience what we are.

The more we have invested (of ourselves) in this world, the less willing we will be to let go of it. While the mind wrestles with the wraiths of impermanence, in its futile attempts to gain control (over the targets of its fear), and while we struggle to become (accepted or important in the eyes of others) we grasp continuously at the foundation of relative existence. The Absolute thus remains unknown.

I get this picture of an enormous, self-governed, artificial intelligence which reaches out (with one of its numerous antennas of sense) and connects to a tiny box within which a simple computer-game is running. Attracted to that game of climbing ladders, jumping barrels, and saving damsels in distress, the antenna inside the box forgets its greater self (the Master AI) and freedom. It now fears the digital barrels, and the screams of the damsel keeps it busy climbing ladders and collecting points. What in this situation would give it the courage and space to pause for a while, and remember its true nature?

It cannot stop the barrels from rolling, and therefore it must accept them. Not fear, not hate, not repel, but accept them. Love is even better. Save the damsel, love the damsel, but let go of possessive desire. (More about love in a later blog-post). Hiding, or bailing out from life is a repellent, negative energy decision, which gives importance and substance to the world we are trying to transcend, so that will not work.

The only solution available is detachment. If we can learn to accept, or maybe even love, whatever we encounter in this world, while to the best of our abilities, we avoid to cling, crave, desire, hate, fear, loath, judge, or in any way become seriously involved with it, then we may reach a point where we can see within ourselves the true meaning of detachment, and how it strangely enough takes us deeper into existence, and into the very soul of things..

With experience, faith gets stronger, and as the presence of the Lord becomes increasingly clear, so does our house on the rock, which no wind in the world can move. Only from there, true detachment, and fearless, unconditional love is possible.

Sex and Surrender

In instructions of spiritual nature we are commonly advised to let go, to surrender, to die away from, to empty ourselves, and so on. This seems to be the one trick before all others. Even the “Thy will be done” of our Lord's prayer, points to this letting go. I recently came to think about a situation, which could shed some light over what it is to let go. It is hopefully a situation which people can relate to, and a context in which many of us have had some kind of experience with surrendering. Let's talk about sex for a while.

From the perspective of a heterosexual male: When young (typically) and inexperienced, we tend to perform the sexual act with a lot of ideas and demands upon ourselves. We want to make an impression, and we want our partner to be a hundred percent satisfied with what we do (in bed). There is nervousness about keeping it up, doing it right, and finishing off too early. There might be concerns about length, looks, and tons of other stuff which may cause rigidity (of the undesired sort).

As important as these initiations are, they usually don't live up to our later ideas of great sex. However, with experience, and especially in lasting sexual relationships, we begin to relax about it. We learn to know that we are able. We have had some peak moments, and some rather mundane episodes as well. Having sex is no longer such a big deal, and if we don't manage to bring our partner to orgasm it is not the end or the world.

It may then happen that we manage to enter the sexual act without presumptions, or demands on ourselves or our partner. It may be that we trust our bodies to know what to do, and then we simply let go into it. At that moment we become sex – we become the love in sex. It is no longer a matter of you performing sex, but sex is performing you. This is where, in the midst of true ecstasy, you surprise yourself with having multiple ejection-free orgasms, and sounding like a werewolf. It is a ride, rather than a work towards that final reward.

Sex of course is typically rather pleasant, and it is therefore comparatively easy to let go into, but those who have this experience might benefit from it in other situations as well. There are some things that must fall into place for letting go to happen. We have to drop our demands on others, and reality itself. We have to trust the Universe and ourselves to know what to do, and we must know that if things don't go the way we like them to, it isn't the end of the world. In the sexual act we are hopefully present enough to forget our calendars and worldly concerns for a while, and that goes for other situations too. If we wish to experience surrender, we can't keep the whole world on our shoulders while hoping for it to happen.

Letting go is not an act. It is not something that you do. It is what happens when you no longer protect yourself, when you no longer try to control the world, when you no longer demand things of the world, and when you no longer fear the result of that lack of action on your part. Shortly put; it is Faith.

We may feel as we are welcoming, open, and okay with the situation, but when you happen upon a highlight in meditation, or a change of perspective during a silent retreat, it becomes more than obvious that in our normal mode of daily life, the vast majority of us is in constant protection, constant distrust, and constant manipulation of the world and others.

Without a doubt; There is a terrible and humongous need of letting go. This, we can all practice.

Blessed Are the Poor No More

Jesus says it is harder for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven, than it is for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle. So poverty should be better, if one aims for those gates of liberty. One must remember though, that in the days of Jesus, those who were poor remained poor, and they had basically no chance to escape poverty. People inherited their social status, and having a career was simply not an option for the poor back then. They had to accept their lot in life, and do the best they could of it.

Today, at least in the west, and increasingly in other parts of the world, the poor do not necessarily accept poverty. They may win a lottery, they may be selected to partake in a television show which brings them fame (and fortune), or they might through arduous work and luck, escape their unfortunate inheritance. This new situation makes for a completely different mental climate.

In the Sermon on the Mount (Mathew 5-7) Jesus makes an important distinction. He say “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” It is not primarily physical poverty that matters, but a poverty in spirit. So, we ask ourselves, What is a poor spirit? This is how I understand it:

A wealthy man, does not only have money in the bank, or in property etc. He also carries his money mentally. He thinks of himself as rich. Wealth has become part of his identity – his sense of self. If he loses his money he feels like less of a man. He has made money important to his mental balance.

One can say that from the pure state of being, just the simple I AM, the wealthy person typically adds: I AM rich... not only in conversation, but also in self-identification. He is no longer poor in spirit. This addition to the pure awareness (consciousness) that we enter life with, can happen in many other areas as well, and it seems that that is exactly what most of us is keeping busy with – to add something to our sense of self. It might be things like: I am famous, I am powerful, I am skilled in this or that, I am well educated, I am physically strong, I am beautiful, I am just, I am spiritually advanced, or perhaps something like; 'at least I'm not like him/her'.

The spiritual path is exactly the opposite of this. While you may paint, for example, you do not mentally make yourself into an Artist. In conversation you may present yourself as an artist, so that people understand what you do, but you do not add it to your sense of self. You settle with I AM. You may be: I AM painting, or I AM framing this drawing, but you never try to become anything else but Being. You remain poor in spirit. While one paints for an exhibition and gathers a number of successful paintings in the studio, it is easy to begin this adding in the mind. One may start to envision (fantasize) about how the exhibition will bring great recognition, great sales, and perhaps even glory, but this too is adding to being. Every single painting, every single stroke, must be made from scratch, from a mental point of zero. There is no building to life, because in the end it all comes down again. Mental structures crumble just as physical ones, but unlike the physical buildings they hinder our way to The Lord.

The Lord IS. Life IS. Consciousness IS. It isn't this or that. When we try to become anything but being, we are busy carving our own domain – our own reality and tower. Regardless of our level of success, it is a bleak and tiny castle in the halls of the Universe. This occupation of enhancing the Ego is, in mythological language, our disobedience of the laws of Paradise. It is idolatry and the foundation of Sin. Because of it, we are expelled from the presence of the Lord.

The poor are blessed no more, because they are now entitled to that same dream of becoming – of rising above their fellow men, and to hide from the nakedness of being. Though material wealth doesn't equal wealth in the spirit, it is almost impossible to stay mentally untainted by it. Let us now look at ourselves and ask the question: What do I fear losing the most? Which losses would make me feel less of a man or woman? Behind what walls or subtle curtains do I hide my poverty?

“...and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:39)

God the Snowball

The idea or principle of Oneness is hard to fathom for many people. How can The Lord (the Absolute) be one with the human level (the relative)? For ages Christian theologists have pondered the mystery of Christ. How can a being be God and human at the same time? How can God be both Father and Son, while yet undivided in essence? When this is made into a problem I believe it is because we investigate at the same level, and think of God much as any other object, only greater. In that way we find no satisfying answer to the question. However, if we consider the infinite nature of The Lord, other ways of thinking are possible. I personally enjoy the picture of a snowball.

In this symbolic snowball God is the snow. A snowball is 100% snow. In fact, there is nothing else. But the snowball is not half a ball, or a cube, but also 100% a ball. That is the human level. We are form. We think of ourselves as form – physical form and mental form, body, thoughts, and emotions. While many humans are only aware of this level (the ball), spirituality begins in earnest when we also become aware of the snow (The Absolute, called God, The Lord, or Father in Christianity).

When a human completes the spiritual transformation (Jesus of Nazareth, Siddhartha Gautama, for example), they are fully aware of the sacred essence (snow) and form (ball) at the same time. They have returned to Paradise and are liberated from suffering (Dukkha). It is a true liberation because when the ball crumbles the snow remains unharmed. Identity is no longer attached to form, but is rooted fully in essence. Such persons are manifestations of The Lord on Earth – they are the ONE son of God, because they are no longer separated from Life. They are One with All. Through them form is sanctified, and the gates of the Kingdom opened.

It is important to understand, that this essence (the snow) is not something that exists solely in holy persons, or in the Messiah only. Jesus may have been born into this state of freedom, but it is not restricted to him alone. He invites us into his presence and being “...that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). When the ball crumbles the snow remains.

This believing is of course more than just finding the concept of God believable. The believing that Jesus as Christ is taking about means to trust, and to follow. It includes action and a new approach to life. If a person tells you there is a great treasure behind the corner, you can't just say; I believe you. To find it, you have to actually walk there and bring it home. If you stay put, you do not actually believe that person, and if you don't go there, you can't expect to receive it.

To become aware of the essence of our being, to experience the snow, our obsession with form must fade. That is, as long as we keep feeding our form-hungry egos, as if they were the one truth and lord of Life, we will remain in hiding, and the Lord will not know us. “Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden.” (Genesis 3:8)

Come naked (stripped of ego) before The Lord, and “He” will make Himself known to you. He will even help you undress if you let him. If you believe.