As important as these initiations are, they usually don't live up to our later ideas of great sex. However, with experience, and especially in lasting sexual relationships, we begin to relax about it. We learn to know that we are able. We have had some peak moments, and some rather mundane episodes as well. Having sex is no longer such a big deal, and if we don't manage to bring our partner to orgasm it is not the end or the world.
It may then happen that we manage to enter the sexual act without presumptions, or demands on ourselves or our partner. It may be that we trust our bodies to know what to do, and then we simply let go into it. At that moment we become sex – we become the love in sex. It is no longer a matter of you performing sex, but sex is performing you. This is where, in the midst of true ecstasy, you surprise yourself with having multiple ejection-free orgasms, and sounding like a werewolf. It is a ride, rather than a work towards that final reward.
Sex of course is typically rather pleasant, and it is therefore comparatively easy to let go into, but those who have this experience might benefit from it in other situations as well. There are some things that must fall into place for letting go to happen. We have to drop our demands on others, and reality itself. We have to trust the Universe and ourselves to know what to do, and we must know that if things don't go the way we like them to, it isn't the end of the world. In the sexual act we are hopefully present enough to forget our calendars and worldly concerns for a while, and that goes for other situations too. If we wish to experience surrender, we can't keep the whole world on our shoulders while hoping for it to happen.